Reddit, Solved: You've got two dicks? Poly's got more...

So over on Reddit's Ask Me Anything, there's a gentleman who took questions for over 5 hours about the fact that he has two fully functional penises. It turns out that he does with those two members what every one imagines they would do with two working cocks.  He fucks.  Lots and lots.  He's bisexual and in a polyamorous relationship with a man and a woman.  Yes, he fucks them both at once, DPs, cums on the faces of a huge number of straight men who apparently happily take a shot to the face when it's coming from a pair of very nice cocks attached to the same guy.  To paraphrase the cinema masterpiece, "Predator", he's a goddamn sexual tyrannosaurus.

Still, despite all the love from Redditors on AMA, over one /r/polyamory, he was viewed being less than a bedroom Audie Murphy.

Vanbone said: "While I'm happy that he's found solid relationships for himself, I really hope he doesn't somehow become a posterboy for poly relationships. It would not do much to normalize the poly relationship style."

We here at SoT share your concerns, Mr. Bone.  For years the poly community has been working to craft its public image, building political networks and honing a media message that resonates as much with middle America as it does with the coastal set.  

Hell, as card carrying members of the bisexual cosa nostra, we're as troubled as you are.  Reading that AMA, people are liable to think that we are sexually voracious deviants.  That would be terrible.  (Though for people who think we are, please contact us through the blog)  

But you shouldn't fear.  Anyone who familiar with the frustratingly vocal internet branch of the poly family knows that it's as sexually adventurous as a Billy Graham sermon.  This is the crux of one of the key problems with selling poly to the masses.  You see, reading the AMA about the guy with two dicks, people gay and straight, poly and mono, could see guy having a lot of fun and enjoying life and his body.  People seemed genuinely excited to imagine what life would be like in his shoes.  

Reading polys on the internet repeat that it's not all about the sex, all while instituting relationship anarchy that inevitably breaks down into tears and drama is the opposite. Polys on the web don't sell a fantasy of love and sex.  It's like a car company running ads that just showed scenes of horrific car accidents. Yay, cars!